不過，最令Dracula高興的是眾多作文中不乏佳作。既然已經加盟至Autodidact 自學者，吸血鬼將會詳細講解其中三篇作文。基於篇幅所限，今日會介紹其中一篇，並先集中文法改正：
首先重溫作文題目：
In Hong Kong, many students in local primary and secondary schools are under great pressure. They take extremely difficult examinations and face fierce competitions. Many students and parents are meanwhile given an impression that international schools are 'paradise', which brings little pressure but immense benefits to students.
Hence, it is said that studying in international schools is better than studying in local schools in Hong Kong. Do you agree with this statement? Give three reasons to support your stance.
吸血鬼：
Long time no see! 今日要派發各位的作文了! 大家都很努力，整體成績也不錯。今日會詳細講解其中一篇，讓大家知道這份作文的好與壞。今日每集中討論文法、詞彙等，下次再討論內文大要、推論等等。
Paragraph One
Picture the scene: In front of you is an enormous
room with desks and chairs. Children hailing from diverse countries are sitting
together, chatting in English. They are not confined to their own seats, but
free to run around, or ask teachers questions. This is a typical scene in classrooms
in international schools. In recent years, international schools are becoming
more well-liked owing to the less punishing learning
schedules. Nonetheless, the statement ‘studying in international schools is
better than local schools’ is unquestionably far from the truth.
評語
1. hailing from：hailing from可以取代coming from，但hail多用以表示「歡呼」，所以hail from是較少見的用法。
2. diverse countries：diverse與different的意思並不一樣，在這裡重溫。
3. but free to run around, or ask teachers questions：由於run around及 ask teachers questions這兩個動作都屬
4. In recent years, international schools are becoming：要記得in recent years、recently等字詞都是指最近的一段時間，即是由以前某一刻至現今一刻。正因如此，我們需要用上現在完成式(present perfect tense)。
5. more well-like：well-liked這形容詞極為罕見，建議用desirable
Paragraph Two
評語
1. hailing from：hailing from可以取代coming from，但hail多用以表示「歡呼」，所以hail from是較少見的用法。
2. diverse countries：diverse與different的意思並不一樣，在這裡重溫。
3. but free to run around, or ask teachers questions：由於run around及 ask teachers questions這兩個動作都屬
4. In recent years, international schools are becoming：要記得in recent years、recently等字詞都是指最近的一段時間，即是由以前某一刻至現今一刻。正因如此，我們需要用上現在完成式(present perfect tense)。
5. more well-like：well-liked這形容詞極為罕見，建議用desirable
Paragraph Two
To commence with, students graduated from
international schools may be less competitive in default of strong foundation
in Chinese. Almost in every international school is English emphasized, whether
it be inside or outside the classrooms. While students are given chance to
learn other foreign languages, including French and German, the studying of
Chinese is deferred. For example, one of the international schools in Hong Kong
does not start teaching Chinese until Year 4 (equivalent to Primary 3 in
conventional schools). On top of that, simplified Chinese is used during the
lessons instead of traditional Chinese. On the contrary, local schoolchildren
are bound to use Chinese from kindergarten. There is also an inextricable
connection between Chinese and their lives, as they communicate with classmates
and teachers in Cantonese. Having ability to read, write and speak Chinese is
imperative in Hong Kong, given the fact that it is one of the official
languages. What’s more, due to the mounting cooperation with Mainland China, knowing
Chinese is of prime importance especially when you are in work. It is
justifiable that international school students will be disadvantaged in society
due to their inadequacies in Chinese.
1. students graduated from international schools may be less competitive：由於這一句是想指從國際學校畢業的學生(students who graduated from international schools)的競爭力可能會比較低(less competitive)，所以整句句子的主要動詞是be，而graduated是屬於who-clause入面的。如果我們想隱藏who，graduate是需要轉為graduating。
2. Almost in every international school is English emphasized, whether it be inside or outside the classrooms：這一句可以寫得更簡單，如English is emphasized in almost every international school, both inside and outside the classroom。留意classroom在這情況多寫成單數。
1. students graduated from international schools may be less competitive：由於這一句是想指從國際學校畢業的學生(students who graduated from international schools)的競爭力可能會比較低(less competitive)，所以整句句子的主要動詞是be，而graduated是屬於who-clause入面的。如果我們想隱藏who，graduate是需要轉為graduating。
2. Almost in every international school is English emphasized, whether it be inside or outside the classrooms：這一句可以寫得更簡單，如English is emphasized in almost every international school, both inside and outside the classroom。留意classroom在這情況多寫成單數。
Paragraph Three
Going beyond the deficiency in Chinese, the ambient
environment in international schools fosters skewed values in students. Being
able to afford hundred thousands of annual tuition fees, the bulk of students,
if not all, in international schools come from affluent families. Purchasing
branded products seems to be the norm. Youngsters want to gain recognition from
friends desperately, by means of following them, be it right or wrong. What
they use and wear must be fashionable in order not to be isolated. Teenagers,
not least the impressionable ones, are therefore inclined to buy extravagant
products as their friends do. As such, they may be intrigued by the pursuit of luxuries
rather than knowledge, and become materialistic. Notwithstanding the presence
of rich students in local schools, they are constrained by strict school rules.
For instance, accessories are forbidden in conventional schools, yet the
reverse in majority of international schools. Thus, distorted values like
materialism are not easily embedded into students’ minds in local schools.
1. by means of following them：跟隨他人的行動是follow suit，所以這一句可以簡單寫為by following suit。
2. As such：這個字較少用，而且用法似乎不是用在開頭。
3. yet the reverse in majority of international schools：留意yet後面應該用完整句子，所以可以改為the reverse is true in...。
Paragraph Four
Lastly, the learning efficiency in international
schools is open to doubt. International schools are renowned for their relaxed
and enjoyable learning processes, in which homework and tests are rare. A
multitude of parents believe that this is an edge over traditional schools. Yet,
minimal amount of assignments and assessments may not necessarily be conducive
to learning. Homework and tests are essential to make students feel impelled to
organize the cognizance learnt. It is imaginable that most students will be
idle and refuse to revise in absence of them. Stories of parents buying extra
exercises for international schoolchildren abound. Some even go to great
lengths to let their children enroll in tutorial classes, just to complement
lessons in schools. On the other hand, assessments are incorporated into
learning schedules in conventional schools. Students are required to assimilate
the things learnt systematically. Accordingly, it is no wonder that local
students are more capable of manipulating knowledge.
1. relaxed：四周的環境很relaxing，所以我感到relaxed。記得relaxing是用來形容引起感受的人、事、物，而relaxed是用以形容的有某感受的人。
2. organize the cognizance learnt：首先，cognizance是罕見字，解作the process by which you recognize and understand something，即是認識和理解事物的過程，而非學習得來的知識，所以動詞用organize不適合。
3. manipulating knowledge：我們不能操縱知識，但能夠吸收知識(assimilate knowledge)。
1. relaxed：四周的環境很relaxing，所以我感到relaxed。記得relaxing是用來形容引起感受的人、事、物，而relaxed是用以形容的有某感受的人。
2. organize the cognizance learnt：首先，cognizance是罕見字，解作the process by which you recognize and understand something，即是認識和理解事物的過程，而非學習得來的知識，所以動詞用organize不適合。
3. manipulating knowledge：我們不能操縱知識，但能夠吸收知識(assimilate knowledge)。
Paragraph Five
All in all, the benefits of studying in international
schools outweigh those in international schools, both intellectually and
morally. Intellectually, the frequent use of Chinese in local schools assures
students of higher proficiency. Besides, effective learning is ensured with the
aid of regular assignments. Morally, materialism is less liable to happen among
students in conventional schools on the account of the environments in schools.
1. materialism is less liable to happen among students：一般而言，happen是用來指某事情發生；根據維基大神提供的資料，materialism是一種人格或價值觀，所以materialism happens的配搭很奇怪。建議改寫為：materialism is less likely / liable to affect students。
學生：
Zzz...
吸血鬼：
朕的看法一點也無錯。講你唔聽，做又做錯，難怪人類總是要犯同樣的錯誤!
(第二堂)
1. materialism is less liable to happen among students：一般而言，happen是用來指某事情發生；根據維基大神提供的資料，materialism是一種人格或價值觀，所以materialism happens的配搭很奇怪。建議改寫為：materialism is less likely / liable to affect students。
學生：
Zzz...
吸血鬼：
朕的看法一點也無錯。講你唔聽，做又做錯，難怪人類總是要犯同樣的錯誤!
(第二堂)
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